During the Great Depression, a man named Jeremy Bell traveled the United States looking for work across the blighted farming communities of rural America. The days were long, the work – backbreaking – but he cherished the tacos he bought from strangers and fellow migrants during his travels. Once America emerged from the Great Depression, he decided that he would create his own tacos from then on out – and Taco Bell was born.
That story is not true, but what is true is that growing your own weed is undoubtedly one of the greatest joys any stoner can experience and a surefire way to ensure that you always have your own supply, no matter what type of shitstorm the world wants to send your way.
Growing yourself is cheaper
Even with a small plant, you should easily get more than an ounce of primo weed out of each plant. And with an ounce of weed selling for anywhere between $150 to well over $300 at your local dispensary, PTA meeting, or living room office of the dealer of your choice, growing your own weed can save you some serious cash.
Know your weed
It doesn’t matter how veteran a stoner you are, we all get sold the snicklefritz sometimes. When you grow your own strain from seeds you know, you can always be sure that the Girl Scout Cookies growing in the box are legit. Growing your own allows you to cut out the middle-man and get directly from the stem to soil to your lungs.
We’re not saying that you can’t trust your dispensary or your dealer, but even heroes make mistakes sometimes.
Guarantee your supply
So far in 2020 we’ve had a near-miss war with Iran, a global pandemic, and the untimely death of Kobe Bryant. You can never tell what the future will bring, and if the coronavirus pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that life can change in a minute. And while dispensaries have remained open during the crisis, growing your own weed means being able to guarantee your own supply no matter what the future or 2021 brings (aliens, we’re betting on aliens).
Hey, it just feels good
Besides all the practicalities of growing your own weed, it’s also just a really cool feeling. There’s something therapeutic about watching the seed grow into a sprout, a flowering plant, and finally, your most beloved family member.
But wait, you say, growing marijuana is hard! How can I sustain and nourish a flowering plant for months when I can hardly keep a bong alive without shattering it? How can I create my own weed grow at home when any day now I might have to start going into work again?
Luckily, today we have indoor grow boxes and grow kits, which make growing weed easier than ever before.
Why should I buy a grow box? Are you a cop? Legally you have to tell me if you are
A grow box or grow kit is an all-in-one kit that provides all the benefits of an indoor grow. Like the scientists in Jurassic Park, you get to play god, creating your own little biodome where you control the light, temperature, humidity, and all other elements, without having to worry about rain, snooping neighbors, or all the other perils of an outdoor grow.
Mainly, they make things really easy by putting everything you need in one container, including lighting, ventilation, soil and a container for the plant to grow in. It can also be cheaper to buy a grow box then to purchase all of the separate pieces on their own. Grow boxes aren’t designed for botanists or people with a green thumb, they’re for those of us with green lungs, who want to grow weed easily, even if we’ve never been able to keep a plant alive, much less grow a harvest.
Most grow boxes include easy to follow steps that will walk you through the whole process from seed to weed.
Here are some of the top options for the best grow boxes and grow kits:
- Growing a LOT of weed
Grow anymore between 1-9 plants with ease with the Budgrower, which includes a signature LED lighting set up and all the other basics you need for growing, including soil, nutrients, electric timer, and heat and humidity monitor.
The Budgrowers starter and more advanced kits stand five feet tall but are quite narrow so you can stash them easily into a closet, pantry, or confessional booth.
- Growing big harvests – quickly (8-12 weeks)
A weed gardener can ensure his own supply – a weed farmer can hook his friends and neighbors up too. The Dealzer Cash Crop 6.0 is about a grow box that stands a little shorter than a racehorse jockey and – according to the company – can produce as much as 1-2 pounds of dry flower every 2-3 months.
Inside the Dealzer, you’ll find a state-of-the-art lighting system, ventilation, air pump, and exhaust, and you can upgrade it to get “advanced nutrients” as well. You can go hydro or soil, just keep in mind you will now be the most popular person in your social circle.
- Growing weed on a budget
- Beginners who want to ease their way into this
Much more than just a pun, this grow kit can be yours for the price of a 1/8th of weed and should have even a novice able to grow an ounce of flower in no time. Once you’ve mastered the entry-level pot, you can graduate to the Large Complete Pot Grow Kit, which can grow up to a pound of weed, according to the company. Both kits come with which the company says is suitable for growing more than a pound of flower. The kits contain everything you need to grow weed at home and comes with 24/7 customer support.
- Showing off your home growing op
- Discreet, scent-free, sophisticated weed growing
The Green Goddess Armoire is not only a grow box it’s arguably a nicer piece of furniture than most of what you’ll find in the average bachelor pad.
This wooden, four foot tall grow box is discreet and scent-free and designed to look just like well….an armoire (rich people talk for “a cabinet”). But it’s not just a pretty face! Inside you’ll find LED lights, a waterproof camera hooked up with WiFi so you can show off pics of your grow in real-time from anywhere, as well as an ultra-quiet air filtration system, child-proof, and a “no-smell carbon” exhaust system.
Basically, the Green Goddess is meant to look just like a nice wooden armoire with a secret. And not only that, but the entire process of growing weed with the Green Goddess requires little more than setting it up and plugging it in, according to the company.
Grow Your Own – Now More Than Ever
Before we leave, we would like to let you know that we have been informed by our legal department (which may or may not share a storefront with an actual Taco Bell) that you should not grow weed if it is illegal where you live. They have also told us to reiterate that what we wrote above is not in fact how Taco Bell was founded.
Regardless, if weed cultivation is legal where you live, then a grow box/kit can make growing weed easier than ever before. And if you order one this week, then you could have your own harvest by the end of the summer. Hopefully by then, we’ll all start heading outside, and you’ll have more than enough weed to share with those friends you haven’t seen in a minute.